Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Painting while Thinking!

as usual, i woke thinking how much more can I sleep...:) Look out my window and there was it, the sunlight shinning through it. Was rather super sleepy I guess..:)I uses this smiley sign alot lately, remind me to smile...
Went out for breakfast, well history repeat. The waiter was rather rude against chinese customer i think:)

Came back with brushes and all, was preparing to start painting. My suprise, the colour of the paint was rather same.. Started at 11. I realise how time flies when it was 2.30pm, when I was feeling hungry.. went to eat a prepared meal made by my mom. Instant noodle wei.... We don't have that time to go out and have a meal, all I thought, can we finished it on time.

let start with the metaphor, a very perfect way of saying "painting is like, painting I must say". It is where you paint.... I paint the wall, so that it look clean, I shave(paint) my beard, so that it look neat. I bring this topic to a whole new level, Painting the wall can be similar to cleaning your thought, dirty, painful, stain, hurtful.

I seriously believe time don't heal anything, time just keep on getting stain, getting hurt, getting pain! Time don't make thing right, It is the time when u make the decision to clear all this away. Some bigger scar might be seen even though u clear it with a paint. I believe, time give u bigger strength to allow to you clear it away, to hold the brush, roll it, brush it away. It allow to hold no regret over what have happen. It allow you to be clean.
To be a much more better person, As the layer in your heart start to increase, you become more immune to hurt, pain. That, I believe it is how you get stronger...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere - Frank A. Clark

Hi, once again. Blogs!!! Spend some time, if you have:)

Thing hasn't been going the way I thought it would be. In just one month, almost everything around me change. From relationship, sports to studies, everything. What some more we can't expect it to change. The good things, I have learn to adapt to it quick enough to hold my self together, before it falls into piece. But still, I still think that "NOT EVERYONE IS ALWAYS THERE FOR ME".

To be honest, the problem now a days I face. It is a whole lot tougher that I use to have. Problem involving lots of people, problem involving friend, and family. Some times I wonder, it is best I start learning how to solve it alone, so that next time, when I get "married", I can easily solve those problem that arise. I turn to God once in a while, I trying to fully depend on him, not yet. I always thought I have a sister to depend with, but then I "take thing for granted". How stupid of me to not appreciate her.

Solving problem can be view as wining a situation, taken control of the whole situation. Depend how you view, when does u stand. etc etc........ WHAT I WANT, when i solve most of the problem. I always look for a win- win situation. How it gonna benefit both side of the party, instead of a party lose. Bigger problem might arise, in a just a matter of time. The sad things is, not many of us view a problem as a "PROBLEM". They view a problem as an advantage, for personal benefit. Instead a team should lose, they want to maximize in their advantage to gain victory. What SELFISH people are this. They are so self centered the only thing come out from their mind is "ME". Not just self centered, they think highly of themselves, gaining any opportunity to dominate the other party. A narcism person, always admired themselves most. A very difficult person to dealt with, in a problem, society, any aspect in life. But what it is to said, when the person have already chosen their life to be this way.
But seriously, what different does it makes.... between me and the person I mention above.
The problem is why people think that way and claim the other way. My parent use to say I am a very Cocky guys thinking so highly of myself and I find it so hard to believe at first. I start cursing her for she said, she walk off as if she didn't heard a word of my mouth, because I was angry, she don't talk to me until Cool Off. The moment I thought of it, "why PARENT point out our mistake when we think we haven't make one". Makes sense right. They knew us best, I felt sorry what I have said. Understood the situation well, and promise not to make the same mistake twice, "displace anger" on others!

Back to truth, I am a very arrogant person, thinking that I am so great, just because of some small achievement that I have make in the highschool life. Now that I think of it, I re-evaluate my self from time to time thinking(Am I Arrogant). Now here is the deal, recognizing ourselves, evaluating ourselves is not so much of the point here......

Listening to the "TRUTH", that is the hardest thing that ONE can hear. I still find it hard when my friend & family point my mistake. Hold a second, they would not say a thing if I haven't committed yet right =)
Accepting and Acknowledging it is the best I could say, "feelings" can be wrong sometime, Jeremiah 17.9 "The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked." I would not trust my heart in knowing that Me, Myself is GOOD enough or not. Do leave some comment here, anywhere else in my blog. Anything u disagree, HEHE!

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Ya, it is the day....

2nd week of posting for this semester, and lots of negativity in my thought about people, things, and events.Trying to get a hold of myself. Realize that, friends can only help this much. I can only do this much. Kinda sad. Weak!!! that's it. I am weak, in a sense like really weak. In many thing I must say. Anyway,

Some times, we said! I'm good enough, I'm are myself, accept me or hate me! I'm are not "perfect". All this are good enough to safe ourselves from any hurtful things said by people, I think It is an excuse to accept the fact that you 's**k"!!! But let's not forget, we are human being, we makes mistake. It is good to sometime, sit down, quitely, flash back of what you have done for the pass few month, evaluate yourself, the mistake, things you've say, things you promise and not doing it. Think it through, how much you have cause your friend to lose faith in you. Respect, and confidence are earn. But by WORD  about you can't change that fact you are yourself??? What nonsense!!! We can't please everyone, certainly. The least you could do is please your self in a way "Win Win situation".

YA, it is my birthday!! passes 2 hour ago:) I've many people I wanna thank!! My Church friend, you guys have given me many surprises! Aik, the cards(2 card :p)! the Cakes( i think i spoil the mood) haha! but thanks anyway, made me feel "something" when i'm around with you guys. I'm stil trying figure out the word to describe! :) thx you so much!!!
Secondly, my classmate for throwing a surprise party where i am suppose to give another person a surprise party! Very unexpected! The bags, the cake!!! the dinner! awesome:) thx you!

Surprise are like Ups & Downs. When it is downs, it make us learn how to manage it and let's not dwell in it, When it it Ups, Cherish it, and enjoy it like there is no tomorrow d^-^b

Thursday, June 30, 2011


Can you answer this riddle?

Here is a pretty neat little thing from Paul Harvey. See if you can guess the riddle at the end.
 Paul Harvey Writes:
       We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better.
I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches.. I really would.

I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.


I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.
And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.

 It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.
I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.


I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.



When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her.


I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.

If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.


I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.


When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.



I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy / girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.


May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.


I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it.. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he/she is not your friend.



I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.


May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.
I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.


These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.


Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss. I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Stuff happen

Hi everyone, once again, will be telling out what I have been through....:(
Sunday was suppose to be just a another Sunday. When Pastor Ho ask us to join the outrich team, we are suppose to go around the neighbourhood to talk about the gospel, to get to know more about them. I was kinda nervous, the last sunday, Uncle Daniel, auntie bee shuet, Uncle Christian, Fide, chze zheng and me. we were suppose to find Karman, but he is now at home, plan change, we ended up in the old folk home.

I was certainly nervous when it come to meeting people, meeting people who are 2 time apart of the generation gap. Not easy to talk to. The place located some where inside SK town, as we reach, and we park out cars, we walk in to the home, as we step into the house, everyone was staring at us.

How funny, a bunch of young looking people going into an old folk home. I can view it in two point of view, 1st it is very sad, pity to see a bunch of old folk in an old folks home when they are suppose to be taken care by their family member, how sad, i mean! YOUR PARENT HAVE BEEM TAKEN CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU WERE A BABY(WHEN YOU DON'T DESERVE A THING) AND YET THEY DO IT OUT OF LOVE, AND U DUMP THEM TO AN OLD FOLK HOME. WOW, SO GREAT OF YOU!!! I am just actually telling this to myself, now and always that, it is ours responsibility to take good care of our parent when they are old, until they leave this world, it is utmost responsibility as a children of our parent. I believe.

Secondly, I can take it as God want me to see this, to appreciate what we still have. Parent, brothers, best- friend, friend, and of course people around me. Seeing mentally retarded person lying on the floor at the old folk home, She is only 40, can't speak, can't eat, not even aware what she is going through. Very very sad. Just so to let you all know, all they need is a little of attention from us, children. Being a business man, required you to be heartless, selfish. At least keep a little bit for your parent, those heart of yours, Cold as an ICE.

A things to share... Hope you guys don't find offended, if yes, SORRY!  

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Get OUT!!!!!

In life, you some times wish that, you get out of certain situation, good or bad doesn't matter, as long you can get out of it. How nice, if your wish happen as you speak. But face the fact that you won't be getting out of it untill you are are done with it.

Some how, I know that my friend is always there, always beside me giving, and showing support on me. There fore, from the bottom of my heart, I thank you, You KNOW who you are, I don't have to list a name here:) Ex school mate, seniors, friend. They are just there, hands prepared to catch me whenever I fall(I Seriously Hope so). But why in the world am I so afraid to tell them about the problems, More like I manage to escape from those problem, not verbally, more like abusing stuff that cross one limits.

They ask and yet I reject, They show their love as a friend and yet I drew it apart. Some how I can't find the right person to talk it out. The problem not as big as it seems, but when it starts to accumulate. There is when it start to get worse. I manage to escape, but for how long?

How is it to feel that the request you are given are over your limits. How is it to feel that the whole team depend on you(Teams may not feel it this way). How is it to feel that each time a friend threw his/her anger on you. How is it to feel weak when you say sorry, yet it is one the easiest way to get over a social problem. I feel quite relieved after listing it out, at least I know where to start reinforce it:)

There are more problem that I am not comfortable in saying it. But one thing I Learn
"Life Ain't Fair, So get over it" I use on myself. Stuck this sentence in my brain:)
If you reading this, Don't hesitate to leave a comment on the shout out or below. Wish to hear it out from your point of view:)

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Afraid to Give up

Is that even possible.......

giving up yet afraid of it:)

Many times, i have seen friend giving up on what they want/like to do. From studies, sport, and many more. And out of the sudden, u start ponder upon like, WHAT!! they have the chance, they have the brain, the body, the mind, and still they give up, short to say "talented" people. And yet, they still give up! Not suprise to see some one give up during this year of time, this age of life, this generation(i guess)

dear friend, think twice wei!!!! How many of us wanna be in ur place. You have the chance, the life, the hand, leg, time, knowledge. Still u wanna give up??? If i were to give up something, i hope my friend some how tell me some thing about something...:) hehe!!

Just an advise, If u are in a dilema of giving up. Do think of what possible, obtimistic thing that will hapen when one give up. Don't ever regret, Do look back in ur life and make a change. I am not saying this specifically to myself.

All this thought pop out when i was jogging in the evening, during half of the distance i plan to jog, and then rains start pouring down. And then I have a competition coming up. hehe. SEE YA!!!